Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Jokes. From Lucas


As for my last post, nothing too exciting has happened, so I thought about asking for some movie advice. I’m running out of movies to watch, and I was just wondering if you guys had any good movie ideas? Also, what movie are you looking forward to the most? The Dark Knight Rises? Breaking Dawn? Catching Fire? Leave a comment to let me know.
Now, on yet another unrelated topic, I have made up a another list of some lame and corny jokes. I got this idea from Wilson, who was spamming me really bad jokes, here it is:
What happens when you cross a singer and a rocking chair? -- you rock to the beat.

How do you mend a broken jack o' lantern? -- with a pumpkin patch.

what do you call a lease of false teeth? -- a dental rental

Where did the kittens go on the class trip -- to the meow-seum.

What goes tick-tock, woof-woof? -- a watchdog

What did the art dealer say when a man asked what a picture was supposed to be? -- a reflection of you.

what did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date? -- shore

What falls down but never gets hurt? -- snow

What kind of brush do you use to comb a bee's hair? -- a honey comb

How do you get a peanut to laugh? -- you crack it up

Who greets you at a haunted house? -- a host ghost

Why did the farmer bury all his money? -- to make his soil rich

Where can you find an ocean without water? -- on a map

What do you call a horse that likes arts & crafts? -- a hobby horse

Why do shoemakers go to heaven? Because they have good soles

What do you call an avid gardener? -- herb

If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does chicken come from? -- a poul-tree

What do you get when you cross a grape with a lion? -- a grape nobody picks on

What did the tree say to the mountain? -- stop peaking at me!

What are sailors' favorite fruits? -- naval oranges

Where does a penguin keep his money? -- in a snow bank

Why did the reporter go into the ice cream shop? -- he wanted to get the scoop

Why was it hard for the geometry teacher to walk? -- she broke her angle

What do you call a monkey who loves potato chips? -- a chipmonk

What kind of trees sew? -- pine trees, they always have needles around

What did the plate say to the other plate? -- lunch is on me.

I hope you got a laugh out of at least one of these 
-Luke

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